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Maybe you and a partner love each other intensely but have too many differences to sustain a lasting partnership. Regardless of the situation, love is a complicated emotion. In fact, the ability to hold on to hope in difficult or painful situations is typically considered a of personal strength. The person you love may not feel the same way. Or maybe you feel wildly in love during intimate moments but spend the rest of your time together disagreeing over just about everything.
It takes courage and self-awareness to recognize this. Say you and your FWB have a great thing going. The more time you spend together, the more connected you feel. But try to take the opportunity to acknowledge the good things about the relationship, including anything you might have learned from it. Validate those feelings.
Give them space in your heart. Denying your emotions or their ificance can hold you back. Honoring your experience and letting those intense feelings become part of your past can help you begin to find peace and move forward. Once you do want to date more seriously, finding the right partner might still prove challenging. It often takes some time. Dating frustrations can make it especially tempting to dwell on the person you already love. If no one feels quite right, you may still need time to work through your lingering attachment. Your friends and family members can offer support as you work to heal.
They may even have some helpful insight or wisdom to share from their own experiences. Just be sure to pay attention to how your interactions make you feel. If you feel someone is judging you or your choices, or making you feel bad in other ways, it may be wise to limit your time with them. When you feel head over heels in love, you might make small or not so small changes to your appearance or personality to align with what you think they want in a partner. Consider those parts of yourself you might have denied, pushed down, or altered. Do you feel comfortable with those changes? You may want to avoid contacting the person unless you really need to, like if you share custody of children or work together.
You might want to maintain your friendship. But consider waiting until the intensity of your love fades. Otherwise, you may end up causing yourself unnecessary pain. Therapy provides a safe, nonjudgmental space to explore emotions and talk through strategies for productively addressing them. A therapist can also teach you coping skills to manage these feelings until the intensity lessens. Humans are unique beings with complex emotions. You may always carry those feelings with you in some form.
Crystal Raypole has ly worked as a writer and editor for GoodTherapy. Her fields of interest include Asian languages and literature, Japanese translation, cooking, natural sciences, sex positivity, and mental health. You love your partner, but things just aren't working. Time to break up? Learn when it might be time to throw in the towel and how to do it with…. Going through a breakup can be traumatic. Similar to other traumas, like the death of a loved one, breakups can cause overwhelming, long-lasting grief. Breakups are hard. But we've got some tips to make the process of picking up the pieces a little easier.
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How to Stop Loving Someone. Medically reviewed by Janet Brito, Ph. Acknowledge the truth of the situation. Identify relationship needs — and deal breakers. Accept what the love meant to you. Look to the future. Prioritize other relationships. Spend time on yourself. Give yourself space. Understand it may take some time.
Talk to a therapist. The bottom line. Read this next. Medically reviewed by Timothy J. Legg, Ph. Post-Breakup Do's and Don'ts. Medically reviewed by Debra Rose Wilson, Ph.How to stop loving her
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Can You Ever Stop Loving Someone You Truly Loved And Move On?